Have you ever asked God for wisdom and He answers but you decide to implement your plan instead? My last blog ended with the question-God why are you so quiet? I now realize that He wasn’t quiet, He was guiding me at all times but I chose to implement my own plan based on fear. Divorce can bring an onset of many emotions and fear was the greatest of all. Fear of the unknown, being alone, my children, letting others down, financial concerns, and even though, I had been separated for years making it final made me feel some kind of way. However, what I had come to fear most was the continuation of saying “fine” when asked-how are you doing or how is your husband? It’s one thing to say that you’re fine when you are working to repair or find resolve but knowing that I had been separated for years and responding with a robotic smile and I am “fine” statement was actually tearing me apart. Fear was causing me great fatigue; I was mentally and emotionally tired and when I really got tired of being tired…I became honest with myself then my reality journey of truth began. It is true; the truth really does set you free.
My truth is that I tried everything to save my marriage and things weren’t getting better. I realized that I could do 1 of 2 things, continue to say that I was “fine” when things weren’t or release the fear and replace it with unwavering faith. Well, my divorce was final July 2015. I am no longer fearful to be honest about my reality and that truly makes me fine.
It is important for me to share this truth; I am a hopeless romantic and an advocate for love, marriage, & relationships. I believe that every option and resource should be used to save a marriage but I also believe that if you have honestly done all that you can-accept the reality and don’t let fear cause you to overstay your welcome when love is no longer being served.
Until the next blog,
Blessings & Love!
Lifelovemarrigedivorce Points to Ponder:
Although my blog currently speaks about my divorce journey, my purpose is to bring awareness to all areas of our lives that we sometimes deny or overlook. Our lifelovemarriagedivorce journeys connect us and I believe that our discussions and testimonies can help each of us reach our highest good. If you are saying that you are “fine” when you are not; I encourage you to identify, acknowledge, be proactive, find helpful resources but most importantly be truthful with yourself and release any and all fear.