Whenever we drive our vehicles, we follow traffic signs that warn us of the conditions ahead. These signs are welcomed guides as they assist us in avoiding unnecessary delays to our expected destination. However, when signs make themselves apparent in our relationships such as do not enter, detour, yield, or stop we simply ignore, deny, or suppress the given warning. Experience, wisdom, and my awaken state of accepted reality caused me to identify, as well as acknowledge the signs that were ignored along my relational journey. I am sure that many of you can admit to ignoring external, as well as internal signs that your heart & intuition clearly warned to proceed with caution. It is understood that relationships will endure rough roads but there are clear signs that warn us to adjust the course of direction which suggest that we may need to U-turn or exit the road of harmful, unhealthy, and non-communicative relationships. If you don’t adhere to your warning signs, you will ultimately be led to a relational dead end.
I am fortunate to advise and engage in meaningful conversations with people regarding relationships. I recently had an in depth conversation with a person who said their partner informed them they were no longer in love. This was devastating news to say the least as they spoke of the years invested and recent conversations of marriage. However, what I know to be true along our Lifelovemarriagedivorce journey is that there were probably signs that both parties ignored along the way because if you are truly in love and have met your soulmate, you just don’t fall out of love. My response to this person regarding the unfortunate demise of the relationship was that it’s understandable to be upset when a person decides to detour or exit a relationship but it’s more important to be honest with yourself because 9 times out of 10 there were warning signs of danger ahead. You will experience temporary pain but it’s necessary to accept the truth because it only forces you to deal with the reality that will ultimately free you and guide you to the relationship you desire. Our heart intuition is the greatest warning sign on the planet but complacency, fear, and obligatory love causes us to lack truthful and honest communication with our partner, as well as ourself. If we ignore signs that differentiate being in a “real love” relationship compared to being in an “obligatory/expectant love” relationship, we suffer.
There will be people who you meet along your journey that you will believe you are “totally in love with” for reasons such as you get along, they make you laugh, they are loyal, children, you have been together for a long time and you begin to think what’s the next step in the relationship but if you feel pressure to commit, you don’t want to disappoint, you change who you are as they remain the same, spoken and unspoken expectations, fears of being alone, thoughts of not wanting to “lose” this person because what if the next relationship doesn’t work out is a sign that you are remaining for what appears to be all of the right reasons but what is really happening is that you are living a lie. This is going to be hard to digest for many of you but when you become awaken and become truthful about the signs you ignore, you will become the best possible you, as you will become fearless and free!
As this person and I continued our discussion it was noted that the challenges and lack of communication only revealed that both parties loved one another but it’s wasn’t the real love relationship either desired. What I know to be true is that real love has no fear! Real love is unconditional, it consists of mental, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and a physical soul connection. There is no “perfect image” that you must present to the world that binds you…why because when love is real, you don’t have to pretend or fake it. No one in a real love relationship should be guilt tripped or held to expectations because they are afraid to be honest with you. A sign of real love is that your mate is capable of living without you but the mere thought causes them to cringe, as a life loving someone else isn’t an option. Real love consists of honesty and truthful communication for this is the foundation of success. Another important sign regarding real love is that your soulmate doesn’t hurt your soul; for they are the protector of it. This doesn’t mean that there won’t be road bumps along the way, it means that your mate will smooth those bumps so quickly that you will not feel the need to ever take an alternate route and you will do the same in return.
As you engage in current or future relationships don’t avoid the warning signs, acknowledge them, and avoid relational inconsistency and unhappiness that is wrapped in complacency and fear. If your warning signs connect on all levels( spiritually, emotionally, physically, mentally, intellectually) and there is joy & peace, it’s a green light to “GO” full speed ahead!
Until the Next Blog,
Blessings & Love!